Thursday, March 28, 2013

Life is too short for regrets

I have been thinking a lot about regrets lately. If I chose to, I could drive myself crazy with the things that I regret in my life. After all, it would be easy to look back and think, "Why did I let myself get so big?!?" And I have had people ask me questions to that effect. That's a tricky topic. On one hand, it's kind of like "Duh!" Of course I wish I had never had a weight problem. Why would anyone wish to be obese, unhealthy, and unhappy? But on the other hand, I know better than anyone that adversity can bring out strength of character much better than success. My struggles and my fight to get through them have helped to make me the person I am today. I'm pretty proud of that person. She is someone that I can respect. I believe that I always had the capacity to be that person, but I don't know if that potential would have been realized if I had had an easier path to take.

The truth is that many of the tough times, many of the times we would probably choose to erase if we had that option, almost always also have the potential to be the times of our greatest triumphs and growth. It's all a matter of how you look at it. So if I chose to erase my weight problems from my past, I would also have to erase all the good things that have come from this struggle as well. I would never have met many of the people that have become friends due to sharing my weight loss struggle. I would not have this blog. I would not have learned so many life lessons. I never would have felt such a calling to help other people struggling with weight. But more than anything else, I would not know just how much inner strength I possess. Because between all my personal issues and losing all this weight, I know that I am strong. I know that beyond a shadow of a doubt, and that is a gift I would never choose to be taken away.

In the end, none of us can change our pasts (unless someone has a time machine they're not telling me about). Because of that, I believe regrets serve no purpose. For better or for worse (usually some of each), our pasts have molded us. You can't choose to change the bad things without taking away some of the good things too. I can either choose to drag myself down with regrets about how I got so big, or I can choose to move on from that and to be grateful for everything my struggle has taught and given me. I choose to be grateful.

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